How to Build a Web Site in 25 Steps (1999 Version)

1. Download a piece of web authoring software - 20 minutes.

2. Think about what you want to write on your web page - 6 weeks.

3. Download the same piece of web authoring software, because they have  released three new versions since the first time you downloaded it - 20  minutes.

4. Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on your site - 1  minute.

5. Visit sites to find images and awards, find five of them that you like  - 4 days.

6. Run setup of your web authoring software. After it fails, download it  again - 25 minutes.

7. Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons to see  what they do - 15 minutes.

8. View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words here  and there - 4 hours.

9. Preview your web page using the web authoring software - 1 minute.

10. Try to horizontally line up two images and try to figure out why one is a thumbnail - 6 hours.

11. Remove one of the images - 3 seconds.

12. Set the text's font color to the same color as your background, wonder why all your text is gone - 4 hours.

13. Download a counter from your ISP - 4 minutes.

14. Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor number  +16.3E10" - 3 hours.

15. Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text - 8 hours.

16. Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your web page on your ISP -  40 minutes.

17. Accidentally delete your complete web page - 1 second.

18. Recreate your web page - 2 days.

19. Try to figure out how to load your web page onto your ISP's server -  3 weeks.
 
20.  Your ISP deletes your web page - 1 second

21. Download FTP software - 10 minutes.
 
22.  Find out after reading all about uploading FTP your ISP uses Frontpage extensions - 4 days.

23. Upload your web page to your ISP's server - 10 minutes.

24. Connect to your site on the web - 1 minute.

25. Repeat any and all of the previous steps - eternity.
 
Some of these steps are true......But it's all fun................